Hello my friends!
Today’s video is about the number one thing that I want all of the clients I work with and all of you watching to stop doing in order to get love flowing in your life.
I am a life coach, and people come to me with different things they’re working on. First of all it’s awesome that people come and find a coach. That shows a total commitment to becoming a different version of yourself that’s a little bit more aligned with what you want. They make that commitment and they come to me and it doesn’t matter whether they come for business or personal relationships or health, they’re always working on themselves.
They’re trying to make shifts in their life, but ultimately it’s about them working on themselves and if you look underneath everything anybody ever wants, it is love. It is self love, it is love in their relationships, it’s feeling love even in their workplace. It is about love underneath everything.
You’ve got their intention, what they want, and they figure this out, right? They figure out what they want, they figure out how they’re gonna get it, what they have to do, and in the process of picking those actions, we end up with homework. Between our coaching sessions, they are taking actions.
Often they come back and they’ve completed their homework and we move on to the next step. But sometimes people don’t get their homework done. Almost a 100% of the time when that happens, they are sitting across from me or on the phone with me in self judgment about it. They are beating themselves up about not having finished that, which I totally get. You set the intention and you’ve disappointed yourself, because you’ve wanted to do that.
Now sometimes we don’t get something done and there’s actually a bigger reason for that and I’m gonna do a video about that, but not today.
Let’s just say you straight up failed, totally failed. Completely and utterly disappointed yourself, broke your promise, didn’t do it. Still, the last thing I want you to do is judge yourself for that. Anybody who’s ever worked with me knows that the last thing I want you to be feeling when you’re sitting there is self judgment.
Because self judgment means that you are either approving of yourself or you’re rejecting yourself. We get trapped in this. We think that we want to be a certain way and so we’re going to wait to love ourselves until then, right? Once we get that promotion, make that much money, find the soulmate, lose the weight, whatever it is, then we will accept ourselves and love ourselves.
As long as we’re not there, we reject ourselves. But that judgment means that we aren’t accepting ourselves just how we are. Pluses and minuses, things we did, things we didn’t do. Acceptance and love are… They’re tied together like Siamese twins. You have to have acceptance in order to have real love and judgment totally gets in the way of that.
You’ve got these people who are so motivated to improve themselves, but then also sitting in self judgment of themselves. If there’s only one thing you ever do in your whole life to improve yourself, that would be to stop judging. You can totally say, “Man, I really wanna go for that goal and I’m gonna go for it.” That’s fine, you can still accept yourself and love yourself right now, exactly as you are.
That is the number one thing I would love to see people focus on. Set your goals, that’s fine, but accept yourself right now. Because when you do that, then you have self love. Then you’re exercising your acceptance muscles so you can accept other people, which also opens up love flow between you and other people. Judgment is the number one obstacle, the number one obstacle to love, absolutely. Some people will say it’s fear, but fear and judgment are very Siamese-twinned together too.
That’s what I’ve got for you today and I want you to really consider it. Because if you’re watching this, I know that you’re probably somebody who does care about improving yourself. You do have an idea of who you would like to be and you wanna get there. You wouldn’t watch videos like this if that weren’t true.
Number one action to get there is to accept yourself, stop judging. Stop judging and then you can bring in love, and you deserve that, we all deserve that.