I’ve spent the last couple of years building communities on Facebook.
Most of them have been temporary. They were put in place as support for people going through my 21-Day Heart Cleanse. They’ve been really amazing groups of (mostly) women with the courage to be vulnerable, honest, and best of all, loving to each another. It’s because of those groups that I was inspired to create a more permanent community with ongoing access to that same kind of love and support.
Gilded Hearts is one of my proudest creations and probably the thing I’m most excited about. But I can’t take all the credit. The brilliant people in the group are what make it so special. I’m honored to be a part of their lives.
Everybody needs a safe place to be accepted and loved AS IS. Period.
If you’ve got this going on in your life already, celebrate what a blessing that is. For those of you who don’t, I want to share the five main things I’ve tried to model as a way to cultivate our community.
1. We will keep your secrets.
What happens in Gilded Hearts stays in Gilded Hearts. Your shares are confidential and we will honor you by holding them dear.
2. We will not judge you.
Our job is to love you through all your actions and through all the things that happen to you. We are here so you can say the things you can’t share with your spouse, sister, or best friend. You don’t have to worry about us passing judgment. You don’t have to worry about how your share makes us feel. You get to be you, completely unfiltered.
3. We will show up for you.
No crickets allowed. If you post it, we will come. It may take a minute for us to respond, but we show up for each other no matter what.
4. We believe in you.
Even when, no especially when, you can’t believe in yourself. We trust that you know the answers. At the end of the day, you are the one who has to sort yourself out, take the actions, and be the change in your life. That being said, we will be there to brainstorm with you, share resources with you, validate you, cheer you on, and hold you accountable if you want us to. When all is said and done though, we know you’ve got this.
5. We will learn beside you.
In a nutshell, we are students of ourselves. The only way to make consistent personal growth is to actively engage in the examination, awareness, and understanding of who we are. We share ourselves with each other as a way to connect and help each other grow.
Truthfully, most relationships don’t have all five of those things in place. Wouldn’t it be great if they did? We’d all be walking around feeing seen, accepted, and loved.
Don’t feel bad if your partnerships are falling short. Totally normal! But with a little mindfulness, you can begin to nudge them in the right direction by starting with yourself. Here’s a little quiz to figure out how you’re doing in a relationship…
Am I keeping their secrets?
Am I accepting them without judgment?
Am I showing up when they need me?
Am I confident they know how to thrive?
Am I committed to growing beside them?
If you answered no to any of those, that’s information. It points you in the direction of your work.
If you know you need a community like this in your life and you want to know more about Gilded Hearts, send me a quick email (firstname.lastname@example.org) and I will tell you all about it.